Fluent in English in 10 minutes not 10 years
Neuroscience technology lets you learn a language in 10 minutes!
As some of you know, our Director of Studies has recently completed her PhD in Neuroscience in Trinity College Dublin. The focus of her research was on bilingualism and its effect on the brain. This weekend, she is going to Finland to present some very exciting findings at the Learning and Plasticity (LaP). This new discovery will allow students to become fluent in English or any language in between 10 and 20 minutes!
Direct Language Input (DLI)
Learn a language in 10 minutes
Working with the Institute of Neuroscience in Trinity College Dublin, Anne-Marie Commody has developed a technology which is set to revolutionise the way we learn languages. Commody and her team, using a “liquid implant dye” in certain areas of the brain (the inferior bovem stercore gyrus) have discovered a way for participants to learn 10 years worth of language in only 10 minutes.
“Learn 10 years worth of language in only 10 minutes.”
Drawing on theoretical work outlined in of Wachowski and Wachowski’s The Matrix of language input, Commody et al. have discovered that by sending dye infused with atomic iocus processors to the brain they can cause the participants to speak English at a completely fluent level in between 10 and 20 minutes. At this stage, accents still vary, however initial research suggests that the accent is based on the version of English they have been exposed to most frequently.
This news is being met by widespread excitement in the academic world*. Anne-Marie will be presenting and demonstrating the results for the first time at the Learning and Plasticity (LaP) conference in the coming week.
This technique is, of course, going to be incredibly useful for language students across the world who will no longer need to waste hours studying complicated grammar rules and vocabulary. However the results are predicted to have a devastating impact on language schools across the world.
The Science: How it works
The above image shows the recording device used to monitor the dye infused with atomic iocus processors, drawing it towards the inferior bovem stercore gyrus, the supra-fictum maximus and the frontal dolus.
Participants were seated in a dimly lit, sound attenuated, electrically shielded room 80 cm from a computer monitor. While the students were standing on their hands the active dye was administered via an IV drip into their nasal cavity the students were encouraged to “try” to speak in the target language. A short break was taken after every six blocks in order to minimise fatigue and concentration lapses. Normally within 10 minutes the processors within the dye had reached the target areas of the brain and an entirely new language was available to the participant.”
While no tests have been carried out to date and none of this research has ever been done and there is little evidence to suggest that this is or could ever be possible, some people may still believe this. If you want to become fluent in English we recommend taking an English course and reading more about the research of our real Director of Studies.
References
This year’s Learning and Plasticity (LaP) conference will also feature talks, workshops and presentations on: Suidae flight and forms of advanced communication, *Various Discussions on Hoaxes and Practical Jokes
